Excited!

   I have been under the weather, and that explains my fatigue I have been feeling. I had a sinus issue and it took its toll on my body, but now I am on the up, and up. My parents are back from Florida, and I am glad to have them home, safe and refreshed. 
   Its so exciting waiting to see the list of finalist for "spread the love" I think the anticipation is going to be the death of me LOL. I am feeling hopeful, and optimistic. My video's I sent in I kinda wish I showed my excitement but I wanted to get everything out in under two minutes. I hope they can tell I am enthusiastic and thrilled. Okay.. I guess I am just going on and on about this because I am positive but also nervous! I can't deny it. 
   When I was in my marriage I always felt this feeling of there is so much more out there for me, so much more for me to do and see. I sometimes wonder if this is my opportunity to do that "something" that my instincts were telling me. I mean obviously I didn't leave my marriage for one reason as I have mentioned in prior posts. But I always felt like I needed to take chances in life to get anywhere, and I took a chance by entering this contest and alls I can do it sit tight, be positive, and know that my chances are as good as anyone else's. Alls I have control of is my attitude and staying optimistic. 
  

Exhausted!

      Being productive all day comes with a price that is for sure, I can't deny I am tired. I also have been sick with a bad cold, so that does not make sleeping easy one bit. 
     I had a physical first thing this morning, the doctor was interesting to say the least. She is a young women, who is quite sarcastic, which I am a fan of. I love her sense of humor, she made it as enjoyable as a physical can get. 
    I had an interview and got the job on the spot, so that was a good feeling. I am debating if its going to be a good location for me to start my career, not to sure yet. 
     I did a whole head of foils to my cousins long hair. She wanted to be blonde again, so that is what I did. She now has a lot of dimension and it looks beautiful with her skin tone as well. 
    I have been here there and every where as well today, which is how I like it. I love the feeling after a long productive day, when you can enjoy the feeling of calm. It's nice to know you didn't waste a day, you applied yourself and utilized your time well. 

Pick yourself up, and brush yourself off.

      I have to be upfront about something that I think is effecting my desire for a relationship, I have been single for over two years now. I have done a lot of soul searching, and come to realize that when you are in a relationship, you invest yourself 100 percent, well "most" of us do. I for one am one of those people that don't do things half the way, I give my all. 
      When you are in a very long term relationship, usually you will nurture it, and keep it healthy. If the other person in the relationship is giving his/her all, things are balanced, and there won't be a strain. I held up the fort in the marriage, If I pulled away, there was very minimal interaction, socially, and physically. That was the point to where I said, this is over, and has been. I reflect on it now, and say I was the "relationship", I had a relationship with myself in a way. Sad I know, but I would rather be alone then with a man, who I am carrying on my back every step of the way. When I did take this step back, he did freak out for a minute, he was confused and didn't know what to do. Alls he had to do was fight for "us"but obviously that never did happen. I must say, I have had numerous people ask me what happened to my marriage. It wasn't that my ex was a bad man, or cheated on me, or was cruel to me. My ex just wasn't in it, he was there for the ride, he just didn't love me enough to ever fight for me. I know that I am NOT perfect! I definitely did things that I would take back in a heart beat. But I can't, and I can only learn from them as I hope  he has learned from his.
      Now to the point, I was quickly replaced, and forgotten. I know, I know.. but we were separated and getting a divorce, but to me, I felt as if I never mattered, he moved in with this girl and got her pregnant shortly after. Now they are planning on getting married. I think my biggest issue with getting involved with someone again, is the pain of knowing how fast I can be replaced and left behind. 
    I think I need to just trust that when someone really loves you, and will always fight for you, they won't leave you behind and replace you right away, I need to have faith in that. I wanted to give you background to why I feel the way I do, and what makes me have this bad taste in my mouth about engaging into another relationship. I am glad the relationship is over, and I can't be happier about that! I am happy for my ex husband, he has a new baby girl so I have heard through the grape vine. :)
     I am only human, I feel, I hurt, I learn, I grow and become stronger. I just want to have that desire to be with someone again. I think  in time when I am ready it will eventually happen. For now, I am happy with focusing on my short, and long term goals. I am fulfilled with working on myself, and bettering me. I am confident, and strong which with out that experience and this time of being single I would not be where I am today. So there for I am very grateful, and would not take it back. The times when you pick yourself up, and you don't let anyone interfere with your personal growth is when you build character. I am pretty excited about that person I am becoming.


    “Self-acceptance comes from meeting life's challenges vigorously. Don't numb yourself to your trials and difficulties, nor build mental walls to exclude pain from your life. You will find peace not by trying to escape your problems, but by confronting them courageously. You will find peace not in denial, but in victory.”

                                                                 - Swami Sivananda                                             I can honestly say, Im proud of myself.

Musicals :)

       I enjoy watching all sorts of movies, but since I was young I've always loved to watch musicals. I grew up watching "The Sound of Music," "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang," and of course good ole "Mary Poppins." It would just entertain me to know end! As I grew older I still enjoyed musicals, my Nana would have her granddaughters over for a sleep over in the fall, we would paint, or sew, make dinner together, and then watch a musical. This is when I was introduced to "Meet me in St. Louis" I can watch it over and over. The music, the story line, and how it goes through all the holidays, I just love it! I love Christmas, family, and music, so this was right up my ally.
     When I was about seven or so, I just had finished watching "Grease" and my parents and I were across the street visiting a neighbor. I noticed our neighbor was smoking a cigarette and alls I could think was that move with Sandy in the black tight outfit, tossing the bud on the ground and putting it out with the ball of her heels, she started singing "I've got chills they're multiplying" well.. I did just that minus the outfit and heels. I took the cigarette out of her hand and tossed down just like Sandy and sang my little heart out LOL!! Well my parents didn't think that was oh so funny.. I got in trouble as soon as we walked in the front door of our house. I didn't realize as a seven year old, that was wrong. All I knew was I wanted to do just what Sandy did. But I think that goes to show how much I loved movies with singing and dancing!
      A more recent musical that came out which I love is "Mama Mia" I really enjoyed it! I saw it shortly after my ex husband and I split. My mom and her best friend asked me to join. It took me away from my feelings of confusion and hurt, I lived in the moment and loved watching it, and laughing with my mom. We had a so much fun. I think that is what its all about, living in the moment and allowing yourself to use your imagination and doing things that make you happy. I do live in the moment, and anytime I can watch a good musical, and sing along I will! 

  

Spread the Love

Dear Matrix,
   
   I hope I am giving you somewhat of an idea of who I am. I wish you could see my animated, and fun personality first hand. You can only get so much from everything I sent you. I understand that is all we can do and its our (the contestants) duty to tell you all about us via, video's, blogs etc the best we can. 
    I honestly am quite the character to say the least, I do know when and how to be serious, and professional as well, but I am naturally the life of the party, the one that keeps conversation going, and not afraid to talk to anyone no matter what. I hope you don't take this as if I am self absorbed or anything.. I know who I am and I want to share these things with you, to give you a better idea of who Katie is. I have heard many people say to me after knowing me for a while  "you made me feel so comfortable when you first came up to me." I really like hearing that, because I know one of the worst feelings in social situations is being uncomfortable, and feeling not welcome. I never want anyone that comes into contact with me to feel that way. If I'm at a social gathering I make it a point to make everyone feel like they have one person there to laugh with or feel comfortable around. I like having that role, and I would never change that about me. Especially being in the beauty industry, having the ability to make people feel at ease, and to trust you is so valuable.
    I love doing hair, and make up and I want to be the absolute best at it. I feel like there is so much room to grow and improve! I think with my personality, passion and talent, I have so much to offer. I just want that chance, and I can't express what that opportunity would do for my life, and me personally. BUT...  I mostly want to make a positive impact in this industry, and meet so many people! I also want to spread my passion and experiences with everyone along the way. I hope you give me this amazing opportunity, I won't be a disappointment and I will give 110 percent. 






                                                                                                                             Thank you Matrix,
                                                                                                                               Katie O'Connell

~Today~

*The thing about "dieting" that makes it difficult, would be the inconvenience. Here I am trying to plan out my dinner, and I have the slightest idea what I want that is with in my calories for the day. I am determined to conquer my weight issue, so I am just going to do it and not complain about it... like I just did! lol I'm done. 
 

  So today has to be one of the nicest days we have had yet this fall. The colors of the leaves are so gorgeous and the sky is a baby blue, its so nice! I just got out of the hot tub, and while I was in there brainstorming about dinner, and my workout..I took a look around, and was impressed by the leaves and the warmth still lingering in the air... I actually thought to myself, how beautiful it is here in upstate NY. I hear a lot of negatives about the winter, and I do agree, snow is a bit of a hassle, and I dislike driving in it.. but its very pretty, and the season changes are truly nice. 
  Last summer I went golfing with a friend, we ended up golfing with this older couple who were the nicest people. The gentlemen was informing us on how he has traveled and seen so many places, he said that upstate NY is one of the most beautiful places! I was shocked, he then said how the trees get so full and green, its just a pretty place. I was taken back because everyone I talk to that lives here, says there is nothing here.. I disagree, I think its what you make it! And I think that nice gentlemen made some good points, it is very pretty here! 
   Here is two pictures I found on the Internet, the fall one is from Thatcher Park (Albany, NY) and the other is of the Catskills which is 45 minutes away or so. 

Demonstrate through our actions

I wrote this post on my myspace blog in 2008, I think its pretty good and an idea how I believe people should be treated. When I wrote this it was the start to my path to get where I am today. I think its a good post, so I hope you think so too.

Kindness Matters

I really must be confused....I am not sure, if I am the only one that wonders about this, or maybe I am the only who cares enough about it. Has anyone noticed what people don't seem to emphasize enough about? Well there are a few things that come to mind that I believe are very important, which I try to live by, and people know about but don't apply it to how they act or how they live their lives.


1) Being held accountable for when you are wrong, owning up to your wrong doings.
-This goes with maturity, taking responsibility for your actions, and being a good person. I get so frustrated with people when they can never just say"I was wrong, I should not have done/said that....I'm sorry" What is so hard about that!! I will admit right now I have made mistakes, I own up to each one, I know when I am wrong as we all do! We are all human we do things that are wrong, we hurt others, even if its by mistake, you still effected someone in a hurtful or offensive way, so the most admirable thing to do is own it, and make it right! No one is perfect, we as humans all have faults. I know I will say and do the wrong things, I can promise that, but I will own them. I just think things would get resolved quicker and more effectively if we just take full responsibility and be honest with ourselves, we all know what is right inside, show that you know! Its a good, respectable quality to have!!

2) Being kind and REAL about it.
-Honestly, this task is natural for me, but others.... not so much. They can just treat you badly for no reason, why? Because maybe they are miserable, or just having an off day perhaps.... well the saying is misery likes company, right?  Why is it, if we are not feeling so great one day, why not instead keeping it to themselves, and not spread this unpleasant demeanor. I'd rather wear a smile and make the best of each day, and treat people the way I want to be treated, with kindness and respect. Is that so much to ask?? If we all could do this, there would be less stress, tension and hostility everywhere from home to the workplace!

3) Acting as if you are above others, and you treat them as if they are below you.
-People who treat others as if they are not as important as them, or those who abuse their position in authority, such as police officers, bosses, etc. Here is an example of two men, one who did not go to college, has 5 kids, living in a trailer, busting his ass to provide for his family, barely making ends meat, and taking good care of his kids and wife etc. And the other man who has his doctorate in psychology, is making six figures, has a huge house, 7 cars and does everything for his family as well, I would respect them equally! Treat them both with the same respect and kindness. I see those that are poor, those who didn't attend college, people that are not "attractive," obese, mentally/physically disabled, there are to many to name you get the picture, they are looked down upon and disrespected by some people who think so highly of themselves, and are brutally judgmental. What drives these people to mistreat any one that may be "different" or just not up to their standards of what is considered good enough in their eyes. If these people are not effecting you in a negative way, then put a stop to your disrespectful words, judgmental thoughts, and actions! Is it worth it? I think not!! We are all human beings, we all have feelings, we all have our strengths and weaknesses. Were not here for others approval, were here to live a good honest life, and be the best we can be, we all go in different directions, make are own paths of what our lives will consist of. Its not how much we make, or who we know, or how many years of schooling that makes us "someone", its our character, it how we live our lives, how we treat others, appreciating all you have and not taking anything for granted. People when they pass away are not remembered for their college degree, how big their houses were, or how beautiful their face and/or body was, what we remember is who the person was, how they effected our lives, and what fond memories they left behind.


Taking responsibility for your actions, kindness, respect and compassion goes along way!! I wanted to express my thoughts on these topics. Because maybe people just are to busy getting caught up in their fast paced lives, and not taking these things into consideration! Its important to live your life in a way that makes you proud and to know you are a genuinely good, kindhearted person!

Don't ever give up!

~I am not perfect, nor am I good at everything in this life. I have to work hard on things that may come easy to others. I want to be the best that I can, but with that comes mishaps, and let downs.~ 
  I used to be in a perfect shape, I was an athlete, a competitor. I reached adult hood, my life style completely changed. I went from training everyday at the rink, never watching television, and not relaxing only at bed time. So, when I met my now ex husband, his life style was the opposite of mine. I thought "wow this is different" and I fell right into it. My body was confused I think, I had all this muscle that was not being used and I started gaining weight slowly but surely. I have struggled with my weight my whole decade in my 20's. I will be thirty next year and I don't want to wrap up my twenties this way. I have lost 25 pounds since August, BUT I gained some of it back! I take full responsibility for my weight, nor did or will I blame my ex husband for my weight issue seeing as I am the only one in control of myself! I am giving you a little back round to how you go from 125 pounds all muscle to an overweight women. I struggle with my weight, and I am not  to proud to admit this. I am human, I have a hard time and I am reminded of it everyday. I am a fighter, I will continue fighting for my body so I can be a healthy weight. I don't want to come off as though I don't love myself, because I absolutely do. I just have a weight problem that I will always have to battle. Being five foot nothing, with my build.. easy weight gain is inevitable for me with out exercising and eating properly I will pack on the pounds (don't be jealous lol). There is NO feeling bad for myself, I am who I am, and Its all in my hands. I am the only one that can control what I do. Consistency is the secret with me.
   I am not afraid to push my body to its limits, I exercise like an athlete. Im still strong, I'm solid which is good. I lose weight pretty quick, its just me not getting to carried away with eating out with my friends, and eating to much chocolate. I LOVE chocolate lol! Most women do, but I think I like it way to much haha!
    This losing weight goal, is apart of me bettering myself, taking care of my heart health and overall health. I want to live for a long time, and have more options when I go shopping! I think that I'm a bit limited in that department. 
    I love being active, and exercising! I think that I just get out of my routine and then.. its weeks since my last work out! I thought that I should share this battle with you all, seeing as its part of me. I am working at it and I will continue on working on it! I want to lose 20 pounds by Christmas! That is a goal that is doable for me. Even with Thanksgiving coming and all, its all about moderation! 
    I'm sure some of you can relate to my weight issue or maybe you have something else you battle with. But remember.. you can help yourself! We all have that power, and then once we achieve small goals, and big ones too we feel so proud, and empowered by them! So never give up on you! I'm sure as heck not going to! I'm excited and have been about getting to a healthy weight and feeling better then I already do. Overweight or not.. I'm still the same Katie, I still love life, and I am a strong young women, whom I am proud for all I have overcome. So this is me opening another piece of me that I don't mind sharing.


                            "It's not whether you get knocked down; it's whether you get up."
                                                         ~Vince Lombardi

High heels and an interview

  I love high heel shoes... BUT they are not the easiest to walk in that is for sure! I went to an interview today, and the shoes I wore make me feel like I am going to topple over lol. I am a thick curvy women so it is a bit scary to have that little skinny high heel hold me up :) I love the way they look and how they give my five foot frame a few inches though. 
   I love to dress nice and wear pretty shoes, but shoes are so not comfortable at times. I wish there were shoes that you can wear through out the day,  not feel like your walking weird, and are comfortable but stylish... or digging in the side of your foot and forming blisters lol. I am sure they're out there, I just have yet to find them. 
   At my interview I was following the owner of the salon and the whole time I'm like "please Lord don't let me fall" lol But I don't let anyone see the concern in my face, I hold it down lol! 
I just want to feel less worried wearing high heels. I think in time when I lose more weight it will get easier, but it will never be easy no matter what. 
   My interview did go really well,  I think I got the job as an assistant. I think it will be a good place to start. We all have to start somewhere that is for sure.
    I really can NOT wait to hear from Matrix though!!! If I make it to the next round, I will be ecstatic and I will probably die.. well not literally lol  it would be a dream come true! 

To Learn from our mistakes

  I have this cross my mind often.. and I'm sure people wonder about this when relationships end.
  I have noticed with both of my whopping 2 serious relationships in my life, that they wasted no time to replace me! They never cheated.. but the first girl they met.... boom they're in a serious relationship with them. I know their rebounds, but my the last guy I was married to for 5 years and was with him for a total of 9 years. Six months after we separated  he met her, a few weeks later they were a couple, 2 months later they moved in with each other, 4 months later their pregnant and then on their one year anniversary they get engaged... Am I missing something??? I am in no position to jump into anything. I want to make sure its the right one, and not to make the same mistakes again. He didn't care obviously, he just was glad a girl liked him. I have learned what I don't want in a man and what I DO want. I am working on bettering myself, and fixing my faults. It takes two to make a marriage work, I take responsibility for my part of the marriage not working out... but I have not been impulsive or anything and I realize how precious time is, and I use my time in a wise manner. I want him to be happy, but I do feel like he has made some poor choices after having such a long term relationship/marriage.
  I think the best thing about mistakes.. is learning  from them and changing for the better! Getting through the hardships and becoming a stronger person! I do think that my ex husband is happy and is a wonderful father!! He would not have his little girl if we stayed together, seeing as we had some miscarriages.. it put quite the strain on us. But I think that everyone has a path in this life. I am going to focus on my life and where I go! I can't worry about anyone else's life choices, only my own. I am constantly working on myself and making "Katie" a better person. We all have things to work on, and I am grateful for the misfortune in my life, because without it, I would not look at life the way I do now. I appreciate life lessons, and I want to do so many wonderful things!! 
      Actions speak louder then words, and I am going to pave my path and do everything I have to, to have a good fulfilling life!  I am such a strong women now, and Im proud for how far I have come emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

   

I wish I could sing*

  I love music, its therapeutic and fun to sing along with! I have always admired those who can sing and play instruments. I have always said that when I get my life together and make enough money I am going to take singing and guitar lessons. I would like to play the piano and the drums too lol. I have a lot of  ideas of things I want to learn... I think they would be good hobbies. I also want to learn how to make quilts too. I  think having hobbies is good for the spirit, soul and mind. 
   I appreciate music of all decades. I have such a wide variety of music I love, its great to be open minded in general. I think being able to enjoy different genres and the talents of so many is great. When I figure skated, I would hear all different types of music and interpret it, I would do just small hand gestures that would go right with a tune. It was just my way of expressing my love for music. As an adult, I have made my family video's of pictures through the years of their lives and have "moving" music in the video. I think it makes the videos, they really love watching them.
  My grandfather was a barbershop singer, he has video's of him performing from proctors theatre, and the palace. I love seeing him sing!! He was so good. When I was a kid he would sit with my cousin, sister, and I, he would try to get us to pay attention so we could learn to sing. I wish I payed better attention. 
  I wanted to share my love for music, it has always been apart of my life. Its so good to just sit, relax and listen to music. Some music takes me back to different times in my life, I reflect on memories and I almost relive them. I also think that music brings people together.
                                                                 I  really wish I could sing.

  

Before & After

I want to share with you a cut, color and make up application I did this evening. I had a blast working on my cousin Ashley's hair, she has gorgeous hair to start with so it was smooth running! Here is her before picture:

She is a mother of two and wanted something more manageable and stylish. She also wanted a beautiful color the would shine. I picked out a beautiful dark color with a hint of violet. She loves it and I am so excited for her new vibrant look.

Here is the back:

I also loved doing her makeup, she looks stunning. I really love the color on her as well! 


   I love what I do, I get so excited to see my clients reaction when I am finished. Ashley kept telling me how much she loved it, it made me feel so good knowing I did something that made her feel better about herself! I will be posting more before and after's soon! I have a few I want to show you!


   

What a day!

  This morning I woke up with a stiff neck and  a nagging pain when I turned my neck ever so slightly. So I dealt with that for most of the day! I toughed it out and worked on my matrix videos for being a semi-finalist, I have been working on them for a few weeks now. I am coming to a realization... I need to just relax! lol So tomorrow I should be done and be able to send it all in! Its just really important to me, so I am trying so hard to make sure I get everything out in 2 minutes per video. 
  Also, I enjoyed breakfast with my parents, sister, one brother and his girlfriend. It was a lot of fun. we laughed plenty, teased each other, and just enjoyed one another's company! It was just a nice way to start the day. It took my mind off my neck issue lol. In the evening we had a nice dinner with my aunt, uncle and their children! We watched football and just caught up on what is going on with each other. My sister comes home on weekends from Connecticut to see us, and her boyfriend. Its always fun to spend time with her. So the weekends special because we all get to visit.
   I am looking forward to a very productive week . My first week after graduating from school :) I am hoping to get so much done, and get all my ducks in a row so I can be ready to take my state board exam. I can't wait!! Lots to do and so little time. I wish there was more time in a day :) 
  
  


   

Changes :)

*I am ready for the next part of my life to unfold! I can't WAIT!*


 These pictures are of me with my best girlfriend (Shannon) that I met at school and my moms best friend(Shawn)and I! They both are like family to me :)

 I actually cut both of these ladies hair recently! Shannon in the top picture had very long hair and it was extremely thick! She has a gorgeous face to pull this style off! She is loving this length because it is easier to manage since she is a mom of a one year old son!
 My mom's friend wanted an inspired Chris Jenner hair style, and she is very happy it! She feels more stylish! She has beautiful greenish blue eyes and this style brings them right out! 
 I had a ball at dinner with them! Shannon graduated the same day as I did, so we brought our families/friends together to celebrate our special day and our friendship!

  I also love doing make up!! I watch a lot of youtube video's to get tips and new ideas! I also come up with my very own looks too! Here I am doing my friend Dayna's make up!

I love trying out new color combinations for the eyes! Eyeshadows are my favorite! I love bringing out peoples eyes! Though I can't deny I love everything about make up from the foundation to blush! 


  Another one of my passions is writing as you can see I have no problem lol! I have journaled since I was a young kid! I have a diary from 1993! I always found writing to be a good way to express myself! I have written poems and found it very therapeutic. 
   


  With in the last few years I have been drawn to photography! I have taken walks in historic areas and just went to town with the camera! I also have an album of beautiful close ups of flowers I took last summer. Here are a few pictures I took in Troy, NY.

      I have learned so much about myself through the last few years. I am pretty dynamic, and well rounded! I like so many different things in this life! I don't want to be narrow, I want to be apart of so much!! I hope you enjoyed my pictures!! 

Bittersweet*

  I graduated today from cosmetology school!!! I am excited, but it is sad to not see the people you have bonded with day in and day out for the last nice months everyday anymore. I can't believe how time flies! But I think that we are all going to keep in touch to some degree which will be GREAT!!
  I am excited to see what path I take in this industry!! I am hoping that Matrix "Spread the Love" chooses me as a finalist! I am perfecting my video's and seeing what kind of creative twists I can add! I would be ecstatic to be chosen!
 Today was a wonderful day! My family came to see me graduate, then we all went out for dinner, and we had a blast! I am going on the hunt for a job next week, I have been talking to a few salons in the area but I am not sure which is best to take. I want to make sure where I choose is going to be a good fit for me. I know wherever I end up, I will make it a great experience. I can't wait to see what my future holds!!! 


      
  

My family!

                                            
   I am going to share a little about my family! They are my life, and with out them, I am not sure where I would be! 
   I am the oldest of four (two girls two boys) my parents have been together since they were 14, and have been married for 30 years! They are excellent parents. My siblings and I are very close! We all love each other very much and have a bond that is very special to me. My parents have devoted their lives to my siblings and I. They have sacrificed so much. I am grateful for them, and I'm very lucky to have them as my parents.
  My father has been a big inspiration, he has demonstrated what sacrifice is all about. He in my mind is the meaning of hard work. My father started his successful business in the basement of my parents first house in 1984. He was hands on in everything he did and does! He worked his butt off to give his family every opportunity and to make his kids well rounded. He introduced us to all different sports, and anything we took an interest in. I would not be the well rounded person I am if my parents didn't make the choices they had. My mother, I respect so much for being home with all four of us, she would drive this one to skating, the other to his hockey practice, this one to the tutor, and have dinner on the table when we got home! She dedicated her life to making sure we all were taken care of and had all we needed. 
  My parents instilled in us many lessons. One that I as an adult have been so appreciative of learning, is being accountable to all of our actions. My parents were NOT the parents who thought their kids could do no wrong. We had to own up to our mistakes, and take responsibility for what we did. I feel as though this was so valuable and a quality that others respect about me. I have no issue with saying "I was wrong" I think people are so quick to point the finger at everyone else but not back at themselves. I think when there is an issue, evaluate what part you had in it, and be honest with yourself! Things will work out in the end that way. 
  Every Sunday we have dinner as a family, I have been working more often so I have missed a few but its always so nice to have dinner and watch a movie with your family! Its nice to catch up and chat! I love my family and I can't imagine life with out any of them. I hope someday I will be half of what my parents have been to me.
                   

                                   


    

"When one door closes another door opens"

          Two more days till I graduate!! Even though, I am sad about leaving a journey that I have loved very much, I am embracing the fact that I will be leaving to only grow as a stylist, and have some great experience's! I want to be apart of Matrix's "Spread the Love" and travel the country, have mentors, and meet some amazing people in the beauty industry! I love writing, taking pictures, traveling, networking, and getting an experience of a lifetime! 
          I have had some hardships in the last 10 years or so, and it has been a difficult, and long ride. I went  through a divorce, three miscarriages, and an emotional roller coaster ride that I didn't think at the time I would ever get through. I can now see in hindsight that I had to go through what I did, to be where I am today. I have no limitations in life, I am more mature, responsible, and I am a stronger women! I love how I can actually sit back and reflect on my life thus far, and say wow I have grown to become a strong women that knows what I want, I have not been defeated and won't let anyone bring me down! I have built  so much character, and I can honestly say that I am really proud of myself. I am humble, and never arrogant. I am just a women who is happy that I got through one of the most hardest times in my life! I hope others can see that through me, we can all triumph from misfortune. To believe we all can learn and grow from our weakest moments. Remembering that there is a reason for everything, and knowing that when one door closes another door opens, but when that door opens you will appreciate it, and embrace it more then you would if you hadn't gone through those hardships.

                                                                
          

Expression*

  Today I brought one of my figure skating competition videos into school. I was so excited to share my previous athletic life with my friends from school and the teachers! The response I got was so positive and so many were impressed with my skill level, artistry, spins and jumps! I loved skating, and it was my life for so long! I believe a lot of who I am came from moments on the ice as a youngster and till I was about seventeen. 
  My level of creativity, and way of expression shined through choreography in skating! I think as we all grow, things change and we express ourselves in different ways that are consistent with our life travels, and experiences. I began shining in other areas as well and as I became an adult I started expressing myself through hair, and make up! I still coach skating here and there, but as an adult this is where I belong which hands down is the beauty industry!! I think skating will always be apart of who I am and was, it helped mold my spunky. creative, and outgoing personality! I am still growing as an adult, but I have a solid foundation to grow from! This is just the start really!! There is so much more life to live, and so much to see!!

                                   
      

Camaraderie

  I graduate from cosmetology school this Friday! I am having mixed feelings about this. I have formed such great bonds with my peers, we have laughed together, we have gone through changes and whatever life has thrown at us. For me this is very sentimental, I have been through a divorce, starting my life all over again and picking up all the pieces to my life. I felt limited for most of my twenties, but then I was finally able to spread my wings, I finally knew that I could do things I only dreamed about! One of my dreams was to go to school, so being there I soaked it all up! I really love getting to know people, so for me this was perfect! Having so many great people to befriend and learn a career I am passionate about! 
  The past eight months have been amazing! I feel like we all came together, helping one another out, we leaned on each other during some hard times, laughed through the good times, and formed bonds that I know I will always cherish! I love every one of my teachers too! I am close to them as well, and will miss them very, very much. I know we all go through experience's, we learn from them, make memories but then we must move on and take it with us, and never forget! I am just glad I got to do all I have so far!! Its been wonderful! I could not have asked for a better group to go through school with! It feels like a family now, and will be hard to not see them day in, day out. But we all have our own paths to take. I am excited about my future, and where I will go! I'am anxious to see what my friends will do with their new career's! 
   I will always have the memories, and I am anticipating what memories I will be making in the years to come!